8 Things to Do to Make Sex More Enjoyable

Many people feel really self-conscious in the bedroom, with concerns ranging from their weight and looks to their performance. But whether you already enjoy sex or are looking to enhance your most intimate experiences because you wish they could be better, there are a number of ways you can change your relationship with intimacy.

And, no, you don’t have to lose weight or learn some exotic techniques. Check out this list of tips that can help you enjoy sex more than ever.

1.  Slow Down

The best way to improve any sexual experience is by slowing down and taking your time. If you feel like you have to rush sex for any reason, like worrying your partner will change their mind or that your arousal won’t last long enough, you may be missing out on the parts you don’t even know you enjoy.

Just trying to get to the orgasm skips out on building a connection with your partner and fully inhabiting the entire experience. If you’re just trying to orgasm, it’s time to rethink how you approach sex, partners, and the timing of your experience.

2.  Talk About Your Needs

While this doesn’t feel sexy or exotic, talking about your desires and boundaries is an important part of enjoying your sexual experience. It can also solidify for yourself what you like and don’t like in the bedroom.

Ask questions about what your partner likes as well. This way, once things get steamy, you’re not second-guessing your needs or theirs — which can take you out of the experience.

3.  Explore Sex Toys

Sex toys are for everyone! If you’ve never tried toys before, you may want to explore what you like on your own before introducing them to your partner. With women’s sex toys, you can explore clitoral stimulation and g-spot-focused accessories. Men’s sex toys also offer a ton of variety, with rings, pumps, extensions, and more.

Once you know what you like, you should go back to line item number two and talk to your partner about your desires. Introduce them to your discoveries and ask if they have any toys they want to try out.

4.  Think About Lubrication

Many people don’t create enough natural lubricant to make sex as comfortable as possible — and that’s nothing to be ashamed of. If you can’t make your own, store-bought is just fine.

In fact, it can be even better because there is so much variety available. You can find lubricants that are water or oil-based to ensure you get something that interacts well with your skin, as well as lubricants with extra flavors and sensations.

Hot tip: you might think you’re lacking because porn doesn’t show the actors and actresses using lubricant. But, trust us, they use tons of it off-camera!

5.  Consider Your Age

Just because you’re getting older doesn’t mean you should stop having sex. However, there are some extra considerations you should take for your age. Chronic pain isn’t sexy, and it might even make you avoid intimate moments because you’re just not in the mood.

You may have to say goodbye to your favorite positions or take medications that affect your libido. If you’re seeing changes in your preferences and habits, you can talk to your doctor about what might be going on — especially if you’re taking a new medication that could change your body odor, hormones, and skin sensitivity.

6.  Aim for Pleasure — Not Orgasm

Do you think orgasm is the best part of sex? Then boy, are you missing out.

For many people, having sex is a 15-minute exercise of boring fluff until they achieve those three seconds of ultimate pleasure. But it’s time to rethink how you build up to that orgasm. Sometimes, the anticipation can enhance and prolong your orgasm. Instead of sprinting to the finish, luxuriate in the build-up and see what else you enjoy.

7.  Consume Aphrodisiac Foods

Url: https://unsplash.com/photos/bowl-of-strawberry-covered-with-chocolates-VctkjZHOqlo

Consumables offer a variety of aphrodisiac enhancements to sex that could completely change how you approach intimacy. If you’re looking for more ways to explore pleasure instead of achieve orgasm, you might want to check out the different foods that can affect your mindset without affecting your performance, like drugs or alcohol.

Some common aphrodisiacs include:

• Chocolate
• Oysters
• Strawberries
• Honey
• Nutmeg
• Pomegranate seeds

8.  Look for Your Cues

The last tip on this list is all about paying attention to your partner. There are a variety of verbal and non-verbal cues that can clue you into what your partner is feeling. Some of these might be subtle, like quicker breath or tensed muscles. While others are a little more obvious, like moaning, curling toes, and hip movements.

Pay attention to what your partner is saying without using words to understand what they like about what you’re doing. Putting them first can make sex more enjoyable for both of you and enhance their enthusiasm when it comes to reciprocating all that special treatment.

Try Them All

None of these tips about finding more enjoyment in your sexual experiences are particularly intensive or time-consuming. Even better, they won’t cost you a ton of money either. Take your time figuring out how to implement the best options for your life and your partnership to see how each tip affects you.

Looking for even more tips that can change the way you see yourself or your activities in the bedroom? Talk to a sex therapist for personalized support and guidance that fits your life.